Can One Drink Really Impress on a Date?

## A Journey Through Indie Sleaze: Dating in the 2000s Indie Sleaze, a vibrant and eclectic movement that defined the mid-2000s, was not just a music genre; it was a lifestyle, a fashion statement, and a cultural phenomenon. As this captivating era peaked in 2007, it was a time when young adults like myself were navigating the complex waters of relationships, identity, and self-expression. In a world dominated by MySpace, skinny jeans, and a constant stream of music festivals, I found myself at a turning point. Living in a small town where everyone knew everyone, I was determined to find my place in this indie-infused landscape. The quest for love, or at least a fleeting romance, led me to the world of online dating—a realm that promised the thrill of connection, albeit often with a side of disappointment. ### The Online Dating Adventure Begins At 24 and freshly out of a situationship that had more drama than a Libertines song, I was ready to dive into the dating pool. Armed with a desire for an Indie Sleaze boyfriend who could make my ex, Ronan, green with envy, I signed up for an online dating site. The criteria? A trilby hat and nails cleaner than Pete Doherty’s—if that was even possible. After a few days of swiping and chatting, I received a message from Joel, a 28-year-old who looked every bit the indie rocker. With curly brown hair, a vintage denim jacket, and a band T-shirt that screamed authenticity, he seemed like a promising match. Our conversation flowed easily, punctuated by shared interests in music that made the prospect of meeting even more tantalizing. #### The First Impression: Not What I Expected We arranged to meet at a gentrified pub that was once a haven for old men but had transformed into a hot spot for the indie crowd. The atmosphere was electric, with an endless loop of *Up the Bracket* playing in the background. However, our first encounter was anything but smooth. Joel opted to meet outside the pub, and when I arrived five minutes late, I was met with an icy glare. He was checking his phone, clearly annoyed. The tension was palpable. “I was literally about to leave. Being late’s disrespectful, don’t you think?” he snapped. This was my first glimpse of Joel’s personality—intense, demanding, and somewhat self-important. I stammered an apology, not yet realizing that I owed this man nothing. As we stepped inside, he wasted no time in demonstrating just how deep his obsession with indie music ran. ### The Conversation Turns Joel launched into a rapid-fire quiz about The Pigeon Detectives, asking me to list their members and birthdays to prove my worthiness as a ‘real fan.’ The pressure was on, and I hadn’t even had a drink yet. As we leaned against the bar, he revealed his aspirations as a solo artist—essentially, he was the band. No gigs, no bandmates, just him and his “limitless artistic vision.” “I could be famous right now,” he proclaimed, “but I’m waiting for the right moment.” His self-importance was overwhelming. As he brandished a battered notebook, he began to read his lyrics—poems about skinny jeans, smoking cigarettes, and the struggles of an indie artist. It felt more like a performance than a date, and I was merely the audience. #### The Comment that Stung “By the way, you actually look like your photo,” he said, his tone shifting from critical to oddly pleased. “That’s good. I was worried you’d be fat.” His next comment was even more baffling: “You’re already too old for me. I never usually date women as old as you. Women peak at 25, scientifically.” I was only four years younger than him. I stood there, aghast, struggling to process the arrogance radiating from this self-proclaimed poet. It was hard to believe I was on a date with someone who seemed more interested in asserting his superiority than getting to know me. ### Turning the Tables As Joel continued to analyze me as if I were an exhibit in a gallery, I decided that I needed a drink to help me through the evening. I ordered a gin and tonic, which he handed over as if he was doing me a favor. It was in that moment of misguided benevolence that I took a stand. I downed the drink in one go, nearly choking, and then slammed the glass down with a flourish. “I’ve decided that I don’t fancy you.” The look on his face was priceless—a mix of shock and disbelief, as if I had just pulled the plug on his entire performance. Without a second glance, I walked out of that pub, leaving him standing there, mouth agape like a fish out of water. ### The Aftermath: Messages and Regrets For weeks after our disastrous date, Joel bombarded me with messages. He told me he was still unsure of his feelings, yet he couldn’t stop thinking about me. He professed that perhaps he was in love with me and even offered to write songs about our “connection.” I received more of his poetry—this time about Morrissey and my supposed lateness. Each message became more absurd than the last. I never replied, finding amusement in the idea that he was out there, pondering his next Tinder bio, which I imagined would read: “Poet. Visionary. Undiscovered genius. Looking for a girl who gets it.” ### Reflections on Indie Culture and Dating The Indie Sleaze era was defined by its unique blend of music, fashion, and a fierce sense of individuality. But amidst the cool aesthetic and the allure of underground gigs, there was also a darker side. The pressure to conform to the indie image often led to encounters like mine with Joel—people who were more interested in maintaining a façade than fostering genuine connections. As I navigated my late twenties, I realized that the quest for love in this indie-infused landscape was often fraught with challenges. Online dating, while offering the promise of connection, also opened the door to a plethora of personalities—some enchanting, others exasperating. ### Lessons Learned Reflecting on that cringe-worthy date, I learned valuable lessons about self-worth and the importance of standing my ground. It’s easy to feel intimidated by someone who exudes confidence, but it’s essential to remember that you don’t have to tolerate disrespect or arrogance, no matter how stylish their denim jacket may be. In a world filled with curated Instagram feeds and carefully crafted online personas, authenticity remains key. It’s about finding someone who appreciates you for who you are, not just your taste in music or your appearance. ### Conclusion: The Quest Continues As the years rolled on, the Indie Sleaze movement evolved, giving way to new trends and styles. Yet the lessons learned during those formative dating years linger. The search for connection continues, but it should always be rooted in mutual respect and understanding. So, as I reminisce about my adventures in the world of Indie Sleaze dating, I encourage you to embrace your individuality. Whether you’re navigating online dating or meeting new people in person, remember to stay true to yourself and never settle for less than you deserve. Have you had any memorable dating experiences that shaped your views on love and relationships? ### FAQs #### What is Indie Sleaze? Indie Sleaze refers to a cultural movement characterized by a blend of indie music, fashion, and a carefree attitude that peaked in the mid-2000s. It was marked by a distinct aesthetic that celebrated individuality and self-expression. #### How has online dating changed since the 2000s? Online dating has evolved significantly since the 2000s, with the rise of mobile apps, enhanced algorithms, and more diverse platforms catering to various interests and lifestyles, making it easier for people to connect. #### What should I look for in a date? When going on a date, it's crucial to look for mutual respect, shared interests, and good communication. Make sure the person values your time and feelings, and prioritize your comfort and well-being. ### Final Thoughts As we continue to navigate the world of dating, it's essential to remember that every encounter, whether good or bad, adds to our understanding of love and connection. So, keep your chin up and your heart open—your story is still being written. #IndieSleaze #DatingStories #SelfWorth